Woman Makes Death Threats Because She Keeps Losing the Lottery
Talk about being a sore loser.
Police in Lower Swatara Township, Pa. have issued a warrant for Towanda Shields' arrest after the 47-year-old woman from Philadelphia threatened to kill state lottery workers because she's never won the jackpot.
That's totally reasonable since we all know winning the lottery is very common and she must've simply felt left out, kind of like the way Cleveland Browns fans vow to kill NFL officials because their team has stunk for the last two decades. Wait, they don't do that? Well, then, yeah, this woman is a few cherries sort of a scratch-off winner.
The death threats were made by phone between April and December of last year.
"She plays lottery a lot and gets very upset by the fact she doesn't win," said Lower Swatara Township Police Detective Robert Appleby. He also said Shields was convinced the lottery was rigged so she'd lose.
What made Shields' antics even more frightening is that she mentioned specific dates that she would kill and even made sure to tell lottery officials that she had Googled where they live.
"It seems she was completely obsessed with the lottery," Appleby said, in a total understatement. "She was so relentless it was becoming a concern."
Shields claims she was merely exercising her freedom of speech. For her sake, she's going to need to win the lottery to be able to afford a shrewd lawyer who can get her out of this mess.